The Bachelor - Week 4

The Bachelor and his beeotches are in Park City, Utah and while I would normally say “WTF? Utah?”, I find myself going “Holy crap, Park City is beautiful!”  And in true Bachelor fashion…someone has to say “This is the perfect place to fall in love”…thanks, got it.

First date card goes to Rachel the Fashion Sales Rep from NY.  Kacie B. has now officially cried twice in the first 3 minutes of the show.  Come on girl…get a grip.  Cliché #2, Ben picks Rachel up in a helicopter and head off in the mountains for a picnic.  Kissy McKisserson lays one on Rachel while they paddle around in a canoe on a lake infested with bugs.  Seriously, this is insanely romantic.  Nope.  The conversation between these two is like watching paint dry…actually paint drying would be way less awkward. 

The second half of the date heads to a secluded cabin in the woods for dinner and more really interesting conversations.  Ben and Rachel talk about relationships and the fact that if you’re not in it 100% then you should end them.  Couldn’t agree more…been there, done that, hated it.  Regardless of the lame ass conversations these two have, Ben gives Rachel the rose.

Group date: Jaime, Kasie S., Kacie B., Lindzy, Blakeley, Samantha, Nikki, and Courtney get invited to spend the day with Ben in the great outdoors.  Ben rides up on a horse…I’m sure Lindzy is gonna love this!  Then they head to a stream to go fly fishing – now see this is my kind of date!  I hope Courtney drowns.  Harsh, right?  Yea, it is…she sucks.  Ugh I can’t stand her…so much that I’m not going to go into details about her fish she caught.

The second half of the group date begins with Courtney’s mousey voice talking about how much she sucks…I mean, how much she wants to steal Ben from all the girls.  One on one conversations start with the typical “can I steal him away” bullcrap. Kiss #2, Nikki…then interrupted by Samantha.  Samantha basically bitches about being on three group dates and no one on one dates.  Ben tells her that he isn’t sure if she’s there for the right reason and serious about being ther and he’s not seeing it going any further with her…and tells her it’s time for her to go.  Damn Ben!  Didn’t know you had it in ya!  And of course Courtney has to have something bitchy to say…skank.

Ben steals Kacie B away to a hotel room and they chat about stuff and things.  Ben tells her that he wanted to kiss her in the stream but couldn’t do it in front of the other girls.  He really digs her…and it’s cute.

Oh, but we have to ruin the moment with Courtney and Ben kissing.  DUDE!  Stop kissing her…she sucks!  She tells Ben that she’s lost sight of them as a couple because she hasn’t gotten to spend as much time with him as she wants.  Boo freaking hoo.  I just don’t understand why people fall for such fake people…and believe ANYTHING they say!  UGH, and to top it off…Ben gives Courtney the rose to re-assure her that he has feelings for her.  BEN…that’s the type of person she is…you will have to re-assure her with gifts the rest of your life if you pick her!  Barf.

Jennifer gets the second one on one date with Ben.  They head up to a deep cave like crater thing at the top of a mountain that has “No Trespassing” signs everywhere.  Safe.  After they plunge into the crater they go into the second half of the date and have dinner outside and have normal conversations…refreshing.  After they’re forced to go indoors due to the rain, Ben gives Jennifer the rose.  In true Bachelor fashion, after the rose is given out they get to do something amazing.  Clay Walker is playing on the top of a mountain!  Dammit I want to go on these dates!  Dumb-Dumb Jennifer says “it makes me feel so special that Ben would put a date like this together for me”…um, honey, the producers do that.  

Cocktail party starts and Rachel, Courtney and Jennifer all have roses already.  My girl Emily from NC is upset about how fake Courtney is and she decides to go tell him.  Ben tells her that if she consumes herself with worrying about another girl that it will interfere with her trying to get to know Ben.  Kasie S. goes and tells Courtney that Emily is talking about her…and the drama begins.  Courtney thinks everyone is jealous of her…so wrong.  I want to punch this bitch in the face…hard.  Poor Emily…

Ben gives roses to:Lindzy, Jamie, Nikki, Kacie B., Elise, Blakeley, Kasie S., and Emily...sending Monica and her gigantic boobs home.

Next week they're headed to Puerto Rico!

Ciao Y'all!