Apparently a memo was sent out last week to the nominees and performers that said: "Do whatever you want...we don't care. We've got a really good guy working the dump button for the LIVE show...so cuss all you want."
I decided to give my review of the VMA's in 35 short statements: Read on if you care.
- Lady Gaga always scares me...and I had no idea it was her until she started singing.
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| Man Gaga |
- Kevin Hart's monologue made me dizzy.
- Yay! Brit-Brit won "Best Female Video"!
- Kanye and JayZ performed off their new album - I'm downloading the album today. Period.
- Oh Hi Miley, way to dress like an adult. But, honey...just because you have 5 fingers doesn't mean you should wear a ring on each of them.
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| Rawr. |
- Will Ferril + Jack Black + a bunch of hood rats = epic fail.
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| My money's on the Dark Side. |
- Nikki Minaj looks like a toy chest on LSD.
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| Seriously...WTF? |
- Why the hell is the house band's lead singer sitting in a chair. And who the hell is she?
- Katy Perry and Kanye win collaboration award and Katy burns Kanye on stage - "Don't interrupt me"
- I'm sick of Pitbull and Ne-Yo doing the same damn song for every TV appearance. We get it...We may not get tomorrow... I love this song, but you guys are wearing it out - ON TV! That's the radio's job!
- Adelle has more than one song?
- Is the Bieb drunk? And why the hell does he have a snake?!?
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| Do these glasses make me look smart? No. |
- Chris Brown may slap a bitch, but the kid can dance...and apparently fly.
- "Chair Girl" sings "Scrubs" after Chris Brown's performance...planned?
- Again...Man Gaga freaks me out.
- Britney Spears tribute was AWESOME!!!
- Nobody will ever marry Lady Gaga. Just sayin.
- Eeew Britney, don't kiss that strange creature! Oh, whew...she didn't!
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| Not hot. |
- Beyonce killed it...maybe it's because she has some extra JayZ swag in her...literally.
- Dear Selena Gomez, please pick Team Taylor...the Bieb is a loser.
- Who the hell is Tyler the Creator? What did he create? Who are all these people with him? I'm so confused.
- Quote of the night "To all da kids das watchin', you can $&*@( %&*#($# %&#*($&#*( if you set yo mind to it" - Tyler the Creator.
- Dear Jared Leto, listen to your shirt...
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| No Jareds Allowed |
- Aww, Young the Giant brought all 250 of their fans!
- LOVING the LMFAO Kia commercials. There's nothing better than hamsters doing the shuffle.
- Chloris Lechman told Pauly D that he's DTF. Yeeeeea Buddy!
- Why does Katy Perry have a block on her head?
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| Cheese Head? |
- Once again, Gaga is scary.
- Russell Brand, while strange looking, actually speaks very well. Maybe it's his accent?
- Tony Bennett and Amy Winehouse...another WTF moment brought to you by the letters V.O.D.K. and A.
- Hey musicians...how about we try and make it a year without someone killing themselves on pills and alcohol so we don't have to have another tribute next year? OK? Thanks.
- Adelle sings along with every performer.
- Video of the year: Katy Perry and her cheese cube
- Lil Wayne's performance: Started out clean and actually pretty good...and then the censor guy showed his talents. I think I HEARD 4 words in the second part of his performance.
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| What's the point in even wearing pants? |
- Oh, and if you were wondering "boxers or briefs"...Weezy is obviously a briefs guy.
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