Monday, February 13, 2012

The Bachelor - Week 7

I can’t Belize we’re in Belize!  Hardy-har-har.  In all seriousness, this week is the week that leads up to the home town dates where Ben gets to meet the (probably crazy) families of the ladies he chooses.  There’s 6 girls left…is it just me or is this season going by REALLY fast?

Lindzi gets the first of three one on one dates in Belize.  Ben, Ben, Ben…enough with the tank tops.  I dislike a man in a tank top as much, if not more, than Courtney.  In true Bachelor form, the date starts with a helicopter ride to “The Blue Hole”…a 500 ft deep coral surrounded thingy in the middle of the ocean.  Don’t get me wrong…it’s beautiful…but it looks like a shark’s paradise.  The second half of the date is at the Coco Beach Resort for a dockside din-din.  Lindzi tells Ben that she would love to bring him home to her family and that she’s “falling” for him.  Cliché of the night numero uno.  They write a message and put it in a bottle and send it off to sea.  Sweet baby Jesus, please let Courtney pick up that bottle on the beach and bring her down a level.  Amen.

Ben uses my line in his date card to Emily “Do you Belize in love”…see…it WAS funny!  The love birds go on a bike ride through one of the towns, play a little b-ball and shop.  Just like a normal vacation – but with 5 other girls back at the hotel.  They stumble upon a lobster diver and he invites them to go diving with him to catch some lobster for dinner.  OMG, this looks amazing!  I want to go!  At dinner Emily extends an invitation to Ben to come meet her family, and Ben extends his tongue into Emily’s mouth.

Courtney went from suicidal to her usual bitchy self once she got the last one on one date.  Ben takes the skank to a Mayan temple in the jungle where Courtney tells Ben that she wasn’t going to accept a rose from him if she didn’t get the one on one date.  Ben tells Courtney that he liked her on the group dates because she stood out and made herself the center of attention and that showed him that she cared.  Um, sweetheart…she thinks this is a game…those were just the tactics of her evil plan.  They hike up the temple and I hope a strong breeze comes by and pushes her off.  I know, that’s mean…sorry.  I don’t even want to see her face anymore…Ben, please send her home.  She’s so freaking fake!  Now I’m just angry.  I just tuned her out, but what I caught was that she has been putting down the other girls for the past 3 minutes.  Keep diggin’ bitch, keep diggin’.

Ben wakes the three girls he’s taking on the group date at 4:00am and the girls are frantically shaving themselves to get ready for the really early morning date.  As the sun rises, the girls and Ben head out to sea on a catamaran.  Ben is wearing another tank top…come on dude.  Ben tells the girls that they’re going shark diving and that the sharks get aggressive to punch them in the nose.  Good tip.  Rachel is terrified and monopolizing on her fear by taking up all of Ben’s attention…and the other girls are not too happy about that.  Kacie B tells Ben that she’s falling in love with him during the second part of the date – finally someone who isn’t afraid to say the “L” word and not just “I’m falling for you”.  And Ben gives her the rose for opening up to him so much.  Yay!

The girls start talking to Ben about their concerns with Courtney and that he should “tread lightly”.  Understatement of the year.

At the beginning of the cocktail party Courtney tells everyone that she’s not nervous and that “Ben isn’t the only guy in the world” and they shouldn’t be so somber.  WHOA, girl…you’re seriously crazy.  Uh oh, Ben isn’t having a cocktail party – Chris Harrison tells the girls they are going straight to the rose ceremony.  OMG, is it going to happen???  Is he really going to send Courtney home???  

Before Ben starts the ceremony, he steals Courtney away to talk to her about the week.  Ben asks her if she's there for the right reason and she responds by saying that she's there for him and it's been hard but she wasn't there to make friends.  Blah Blah Blah.

Nikki, Lindzi, and Courtney (I just yelled GD) get roses.  Rachel and Emily are headed home...guess Ben doesn't like blondes. 

Next week is hometown dates and I hope that Courtney's family is crazy enough to scare Ben away - since he obviously doesn't see the crazy gushing out of her big ass head.

By the way...just wanted to remind you that in Week 3 I picked Kacie B, Lindzi, and Nikki as my final 3.  That is all.  Goodnight.

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